Skip to main content

Interpersonal Boundaries: Change and the Holy Spirit

Thought:

Jesus said to them, "My Father is always at his work to this very day, and I, too, am working."

John 5:17


I consider my last two blog articles to be uncomfortable topics. It's frustrating to know that I don’t have the right or the power to change those around me. This is particularly discouraging news considering my job as a therapist. What am I doing, if I am not changing people? Is there any hope if I don't have the power to change others? I think there is.

God loves the whole world. It is his desire that not one of us is lost to sin (1 Timothy 2:3-4). He knows we need help. As Jesus was preparing to be crucified, he told his disciplines that he was sending the Comforter or Counselor to be with his people for forever (John 14:16). The word Counselor is Greek for "parakletos" which literally means "called to one's side." It is used to describe an advocate or an intercessor. Jesus further explained that it will be the work of the Counselor or Holy Spirit to convict the lost of their guilt (John 16:7-11), to encourage and exhort the believers (John 14:16), and to reveal the truth of Jesus (John 16:13).

This battle isn't ours, it's God's. We may be powerless to change others, but God is at work.

What is our job? Timothy tells us to pray. That is our task. "I urge, then, first of all, that requests, prayers, intercession and thanksgiving be made for everyone. . . This is good, and pleases God our Savior, who wants all men to be saved and to come to a knowledge of the truth (1 Timothy 2:1, 3-4)." Good advice. James takes it a step farther. He tells us that our prayers are powerful and effective (James 5:17). Even if we feel helpless, we really are not. Much is being done with our prayers. We are joining the work that God already is doing through his Holy Spirit. We need to remember that God's investment is much greater than our own. He loves this world so much that he did not even withhold his only son in order to save us.

My current favorite Bible verse is today's thought, John 5:17. I have seen this truth in my office. God is always at work to set every person free from all kinds of sins. My job is to release my loved ones to God's care and to pray on their behalf. I know this is difficult. It can feel discouraging, useless, and even hopeless. But when I start to feel powerless, I remember that God has much more invested in this situation than I do. It is then I find hope and encouragement.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Narcissism: Understanding the Effects of Narcissistic Parenting

Since Freud, researchers have studied various environmental effects on maturing personalities, and it has been well documented that parenting styles are profoundly involved in the shaping of children’s developing psyches. It is hard enough working with a narcissistic boss or living with a narcissistic spouse, but being raised by narcissistic parents has several serious emotional consequences. What are some of these effects? Dr. Paul Meier in his book, You Might Be a Narcissist If . . . How to Identify Narcissism in Ourselves and Others and what We Can Do About It , identifies four consequences of narcissistic parenting. They are: 1) the  development of a false self; 2) the desire to behave with perfectionism; 3) chronic habits of passivity; and 4) increased vulnerability to addictive behaviors. The Development of a False Self Since narcissistic parents unconsciously need others to help soothe their fragile sense of self, they naturally turn to any available relationsh...

Antisocial Personality Disorder Resource List

This is the final article in the series looking at Antisocial Personality Disorder. I plan to start a new series discussing various aspects of Depression in January 2013. Hope everyone has a wonderful, happy holiday season! Resource List Snakes in Suits: When Psychopaths go to Work by Paul Babiak, PhD & Robert D. Hare, PhD (2006) HarperCollins Publishers Not all individuals with Antisocial Personality Disorder (APD) are in prison, many are among us. They work and play alongside us. Babiak and Hare reveal the common ploys of psychopaths, especially in the corporate world. The authors provide detailed suggestions about how to screen for psychopaths in the interview process as well as how to protect the work environment from those whose main goals are to manipulate and exploit the workplace. This is an outstanding book for those in the business world who would like to become more aware of the subtle warning signs of psychopaths.   The Sociopa...

Borderline Personality Disorder: Characteristics and Development of BPD

I recently came across a YouTube clip from the fourth season of Bravo’s The Real Housewives of New Jersey . In this episode Teresa Guidice exploded in a fit of rage and flipped over a restaurant table. I don’t watch the show or know if any of these women have a psychological condition, but I was struck by Teresa’s display of impulsivity and disruptive behavior. The scene takes place at a very nice restaurant. Teresa is arguing with a friend. When the friend becomes insulting, Teresa responds with rage. She begins a tirade while pounding the table with her fist and finally flips the table over. Several men rush to her side. She shoves one away, but allows another to comfort her. She then calms down and they end their conversation with a kiss.  In a post interview Teresa seems unaware of the intensity of her emotional outburst. She doesn’t realize she shoved her male friend. She is also out of touch with her table guests’ reactions of shock and confusion...